OOPS! Tsunami now knows of the AntiKwek, thanks to the double sided use of foolscap paper.
Anyway, here's the latest AntiKwek poem that I wrote right after Kwek released his 100th post.
Kwek has released his 100th post today
With cheers and celebrations all coming underway
But what a pathetic loser Theophilus Kwek has been
For with such a big occasion, no poem can be seen
Why? I asked myself, with a sudden pause
I thought awhile, and then I knew, the lack of poem's cause
I found out the reason for his poetry's demise
He was afraid, and he knew, that I would criticise
Kwek is shirking under the attacks of my hard onslaught
He cannot write a poem too good to find a fault
Coming near and closer is the victory that we seek
We are winning, Kwek is losing, let's strike while he is weak
Wednesday, 25 June 2008
OmG School has started!
school has started.
oh no.
mouldy classrooms and fragging would always haunt me.
do THEY haunt YOU?
oh no.
mouldy classrooms and fragging would always haunt me.
do THEY haunt YOU?
Sunday, 15 June 2008
You have betrayed me...
I told you, but you would not hear
I showed you, but you would not see
And now, doomsday is near
For you have betrayed me
Will you stay forever deaf and blind
By the lies that Kwek has said?
Will you let those evil shackles bind
Your thoughts? Your mind? Your head?
I am trying to save you from Kwek
Do not bite the hand that feeds you!
I have fallen, but I will not slack
And I will start anew
We will fight through flood or drought
We will give our all
We will fight till the sun burns out
Answer the AK's call!
The time has come to make a choice
You all must learn to see!
The land must ring with Kwek's dying voice:
“You have betrayed me”
Thursday, 12 June 2008
Another Poem
Sorry, this poem is Kwek's. Time to groan in disappointment.
Back to the past
I stepped into the classroom and warm currents greeted me,
I stood there for a moment taking all that I could see –
This very room of fate and love and lasting memory,
I last worked in, I last played in, when I was just P3…
"I stood there for a moment taking all that I could see –" You kleptomaniac.
I felt the whiteboard tried the chairs – there was so much to do,
This stark and empty classroom never felt so hip, so cool –
I thought I’d left this room behind when I’d transferred out of school,
But now I think, wheree’er I go, this room must come along too…
"I felt the whiteboard tried the chairs" The whiteboard tried the chairs? You mean the whiteboard sat on the chairs?
"wheree’er" Not again.
Well, you gotta work on your meter, Kwek.
So much I’d give to hear the jokes that sprang in these four walls,
So much I’d give to feel the sweat to sweep these very floors –
And yes I know! When this bell rang we charged out of this door,
I wish I could – return in time – be nine forevermore…
"So much I’d give to feel the sweat to sweep these very floors –" I think we need an extra comma.
"So much I’d give to hear the jokes that sprang in these four walls," I think you already heard them.
My ears ring with nicknames I thought I’d never hear again,
My eyes see children cry and play in sunshine or in rain –
My heart feels those deep bonds we had – to feel each other’s pain,
To feel each other’s thoughts – sadly these bonds we don’t maintain…
"sadly these bonds we don’t maintain…" Aha. Once more Kwek shows us the horrible language that is typical of Kwekean poetry.
As we grow older there is that chance I’ll never see those faces,
As we grow distant I may not read my once-best-friend’s grimaces –
And even mem’ries don’t last for long, the passage of time erases,
So now before it’s late let’s meet – we haven’t met in ages!
"mem’ries". Another characteristic of Kwek's poetry. Horrible contractions. Note that grimace is not pronounced in such a way that it rhymes with face.
I happen to know that writing poems like this are quite easy. Because the lines are long, it is much easier to rhyme and sound natural at the same time. Cheap but effective.
Let's look at the rhyme scheme now.
AAAA/BCCB/DEEE/FFFF/GHII
Will you please just choose one and get it over with?
Oh no, I can't stand this much longer. I'm going to identify clouds and attempt to predict the weather.
Back to the past
I stepped into the classroom and warm currents greeted me,
I stood there for a moment taking all that I could see –
This very room of fate and love and lasting memory,
I last worked in, I last played in, when I was just P3…
"I stood there for a moment taking all that I could see –" You kleptomaniac.
I felt the whiteboard tried the chairs – there was so much to do,
This stark and empty classroom never felt so hip, so cool –
I thought I’d left this room behind when I’d transferred out of school,
But now I think, wheree’er I go, this room must come along too…
"I felt the whiteboard tried the chairs" The whiteboard tried the chairs? You mean the whiteboard sat on the chairs?
"wheree’er" Not again.
Well, you gotta work on your meter, Kwek.
So much I’d give to hear the jokes that sprang in these four walls,
So much I’d give to feel the sweat to sweep these very floors –
And yes I know! When this bell rang we charged out of this door,
I wish I could – return in time – be nine forevermore…
"So much I’d give to feel the sweat to sweep these very floors –" I think we need an extra comma.
"So much I’d give to hear the jokes that sprang in these four walls," I think you already heard them.
My ears ring with nicknames I thought I’d never hear again,
My eyes see children cry and play in sunshine or in rain –
My heart feels those deep bonds we had – to feel each other’s pain,
To feel each other’s thoughts – sadly these bonds we don’t maintain…
"sadly these bonds we don’t maintain…" Aha. Once more Kwek shows us the horrible language that is typical of Kwekean poetry.
As we grow older there is that chance I’ll never see those faces,
As we grow distant I may not read my once-best-friend’s grimaces –
And even mem’ries don’t last for long, the passage of time erases,
So now before it’s late let’s meet – we haven’t met in ages!
"mem’ries". Another characteristic of Kwek's poetry. Horrible contractions. Note that grimace is not pronounced in such a way that it rhymes with face.
I happen to know that writing poems like this are quite easy. Because the lines are long, it is much easier to rhyme and sound natural at the same time. Cheap but effective.
Let's look at the rhyme scheme now.
AAAA/BCCB/DEEE/FFFF/GHII
Will you please just choose one and get it over with?
Oh no, I can't stand this much longer. I'm going to identify clouds and attempt to predict the weather.
Tuesday, 10 June 2008
A Cause for Celebration
Kwek has a new post..... but something seems missing.
Oh no! Where's the poem. Could it be that Kwek has finally come to terms with reality? Or does he just not want to attract more criticism?
Fear not, my allies. Do not hate, do not anger, do not envy. Rejoice! For today, we have achieved a great success. A success so great that an explanation of its scale is difficult. For we have stopped Kwek from corrupting the minds of all his readers with his soulless and deplorable poetry.
Two thousand years ago, the proudest boast was "civis romanus sum". Forty-five years ago, the proudest boast was "ich bin ein berliner". But today, with the existence of Kwek, the proudest boast is "I am an AntiKwek".
For we are making a noble sacrifice! We work all day, without expecting anything in return, to save the world from the evilness created by the perusal of Kwek's poetry. We advance into treacherous territory, to protect other innocent people from falling victim to its lack of rhyme, meter, and sincerity.
Two score and three years ago, our fathers brought forth on this island a new nation, conceived in liberty. But I ask you now. Are we free? Can we be free when we are bound by the shackles of Kwek's poetry? We cannot. And we must fight for our freedom! We must fight for what is right; our country, our friends, our families. Mr Kwek, tear up these poems!
I have a dream today! A dream that one day, children everywhere will be able to surf the internet without fear of bumping into one of the many pieces of Kwek's poetry.
I have a dream today! A dream that one day, Kwek's poetry will be eradicated from this earth, lost forever in the dark confines of cyberspace, forever hidden to mortal eyes.
And who will help bring about this change? Not you, nor I, but us. You must lend your assistance to this noble cause, and help preserve the world's delicate balance. For how long, will you allow Kwek too pollute the minds of our fellow citizens? For how long, will you tolerate Kwek's desecration of cyberspace? I do not know about you, but I will condone this no longer!
Now is the time to take action. It is the time to bring Kwek down, once and for all. It is time to resist, and fight back. We cannot wait until it is too late. We must strike when he is at his weakest. It is now, or never.
Join the resistance. Join the AntiKwek.
Oh no! Where's the poem. Could it be that Kwek has finally come to terms with reality? Or does he just not want to attract more criticism?
Fear not, my allies. Do not hate, do not anger, do not envy. Rejoice! For today, we have achieved a great success. A success so great that an explanation of its scale is difficult. For we have stopped Kwek from corrupting the minds of all his readers with his soulless and deplorable poetry.
Two thousand years ago, the proudest boast was "civis romanus sum". Forty-five years ago, the proudest boast was "ich bin ein berliner". But today, with the existence of Kwek, the proudest boast is "I am an AntiKwek".
For we are making a noble sacrifice! We work all day, without expecting anything in return, to save the world from the evilness created by the perusal of Kwek's poetry. We advance into treacherous territory, to protect other innocent people from falling victim to its lack of rhyme, meter, and sincerity.
Two score and three years ago, our fathers brought forth on this island a new nation, conceived in liberty. But I ask you now. Are we free? Can we be free when we are bound by the shackles of Kwek's poetry? We cannot. And we must fight for our freedom! We must fight for what is right; our country, our friends, our families. Mr Kwek, tear up these poems!
I have a dream today! A dream that one day, children everywhere will be able to surf the internet without fear of bumping into one of the many pieces of Kwek's poetry.
I have a dream today! A dream that one day, Kwek's poetry will be eradicated from this earth, lost forever in the dark confines of cyberspace, forever hidden to mortal eyes.
And who will help bring about this change? Not you, nor I, but us. You must lend your assistance to this noble cause, and help preserve the world's delicate balance. For how long, will you allow Kwek too pollute the minds of our fellow citizens? For how long, will you tolerate Kwek's desecration of cyberspace? I do not know about you, but I will condone this no longer!
Now is the time to take action. It is the time to bring Kwek down, once and for all. It is time to resist, and fight back. We cannot wait until it is too late. We must strike when he is at his weakest. It is now, or never.
Join the resistance. Join the AntiKwek.
Monday, 9 June 2008
holiday reminder
reminder for everyone to complete their projects/book review etc.
but don't forget to enjoy yourself too! (if you have the time...)
but don't forget to enjoy yourself too! (if you have the time...)
sowi
sowi didnt know difference of sarcasm and real words. i fail irl kay?
1) idk you at the start... (now i know) so how wud i know whether u gud or bad towards kwek?
2) "so, those people who misunderstand and jump to conclusions hastily, use your brains somemore. maybe just a little if you cant spare much." read the line above this paragraph.
3) maybe you should learn a new tip, if writing a sarcastic remark, type something like "Absoulutely no sarcasm intended" or "People with <50IQ not welcome". make it more obvious for idiots like me.
4) "Either you dont understand me, or you cannot understand."
at first, both, now i do.
so, sorry to anyone who has been... emotionally hurt? <3 u all and sorry
peace.
to Dovilourus Dragsterx: i know im wrong for not understanding sarcasm, so don't start a flame war plx :) if you continue the flame war, ima cry /sarcasm
to everyone: play hard, but rmb to do hw :) have fun in last 2 weeks of hols.
1) idk you at the start... (now i know) so how wud i know whether u gud or bad towards kwek?
2) "so, those people who misunderstand and jump to conclusions hastily, use your brains somemore. maybe just a little if you cant spare much." read the line above this paragraph.
3) maybe you should learn a new tip, if writing a sarcastic remark, type something like "Absoulutely no sarcasm intended" or "People with <50IQ not welcome". make it more obvious for idiots like me.
4) "Either you dont understand me, or you cannot understand."
at first, both, now i do.
so, sorry to anyone who has been... emotionally hurt? <3 u all and sorry
peace.
to Dovilourus Dragsterx: i know im wrong for not understanding sarcasm, so don't start a flame war plx :) if you continue the flame war, ima cry /sarcasm
to everyone: play hard, but rmb to do hw :) have fun in last 2 weeks of hols.
Arrgh.
You know... I really want to rebut everything, but I closed the convo window.
ben: i wonder whether you even get what are ABS...
ben: i wonder whether you even get what are ABS...
ben: maybe next time you will have ABS?
See? That's an attack on me.
Oh yes. Kwek's poems are not individuals. Of course, if you meant that it's a separate or distinct thing, then you would have to say "individual poems".
Definition number 7 from www.dictionary.com: single; particular; separate: to number individual copies of a limited edition.
Note that in the example sentence given, there is a noun after the individual that talks about what the word individual is referring to. For those of you who cannot find it, then the noun is "copies".
Time for another quote.
"individual attacks"
This could mean 1 of 2 things.
1. Single, particular, or separate attacks.
2. Attacks on an individual.
Well, it's probably number 2. But since I'm only attacking Kwek's poems, and they aren't individuals, I'm not guilty!
I rest my case.
See? That's an attack on me.
Oh yes. Kwek's poems are not individuals. Of course, if you meant that it's a separate or distinct thing, then you would have to say "individual poems".
Definition number 7 from www.dictionary.com: single; particular; separate: to number individual copies of a limited edition.
Note that in the example sentence given, there is a noun after the individual that talks about what the word individual is referring to. For those of you who cannot find it, then the noun is "copies".
Time for another quote.
"individual attacks"
This could mean 1 of 2 things.
1. Single, particular, or separate attacks.
2. Attacks on an individual.
Well, it's probably number 2. But since I'm only attacking Kwek's poems, and they aren't individuals, I'm not guilty!
I rest my case.
oh wells
guess i gotta clarify this. in case some ppl go running around and crying out aloud! or going red in the face and exploding... please dont be too saddd
obviously i am doing all these for fun right, sadly, some ppl dont get it, cos it will be more interesting if there are AAKs too! (i thought kyx understood, not sure if he did)
since when did i ever like kwek? or do anything to help him? so, those people who misunderstand and jump to conclusions hastily, use your brains somemore. maybe just a little if you cant spare much.
eh come on, am i such a defender for ppl...?
heeeellllo its me, ben, do you think i am that kind?
:) well kyx HOPE YOU DIDNT TAKE ALL THESE STUFF TO HEART, and dont go crying.
dew, im not rly sure who you are, but you dont really understand much i guess.
Either you dont understand me, or you cannot understand.
FALSE DILEMMA!
sorry for spamming tagboard though
guess i gotta clarify this. in case some ppl go running around and crying out aloud! or going red in the face and exploding... please dont be too saddd
obviously i am doing all these for fun right, sadly, some ppl dont get it, cos it will be more interesting if there are AAKs too! (i thought kyx understood, not sure if he did)
since when did i ever like kwek? or do anything to help him? so, those people who misunderstand and jump to conclusions hastily, use your brains somemore. maybe just a little if you cant spare much.
eh come on, am i such a defender for ppl...?
heeeellllo its me, ben, do you think i am that kind?
:) well kyx HOPE YOU DIDNT TAKE ALL THESE STUFF TO HEART, and dont go crying.
dew, im not rly sure who you are, but you dont really understand much i guess.
Either you dont understand me, or you cannot understand.
FALSE DILEMMA!
sorry for spamming tagboard though
Sunday, 8 June 2008
/wrists
I agree with kyx :o. pmg hes talking sense
since *cough* someone *cough* said im tactless, ill change my post kay? now dont cry and slash your wrists.
Dovilourus Dragsterx, dont make a mountain out of a molehill. its just a critique of a poem for leisure. If you don't want to see it, ur on the wrong page.
grow up, learn to take insults.
peace.
o and i stand by what i say, learn to paragraph, and learn to summarize.
since *cough* someone *cough* said im tactless, ill change my post kay? now dont cry and slash your wrists.
Dovilourus Dragsterx, dont make a mountain out of a molehill. its just a critique of a poem for leisure. If you don't want to see it, ur on the wrong page.
grow up, learn to take insults.
peace.
o and i stand by what i say, learn to paragraph, and learn to summarize.
Whatever.
Okay. I don't really know where to start.
Ahh. Let's begin here.
ben: single; particular; separate: to number individual copies of a limited edition.
ben: that is one of the definition of indivdual in case you dont know
Of course, this may be true, but it just happens that ben kindly took out the definition that suited his purposes best. Let's see which one ben actually meant when he was writing his post.
Definition #1 from www.dictionary.com: a single human being, as distinguished from a group.
ben: it doesnt have to mean attacks on Kwek, how do you know i didnt mean attack on the poems?
Common excuse, the truth is, poems aren't commonly described as individuals.
ben: and the pot calling the kettle black stuff
ben: its totally attacking the person, go read your class notes, the one about practice what you preach
Alright. We are attacking each other, so that cancels out. Yay!
I'm not just the only one writing AK stuff, I'm the only one writing.
ben: you know kwek's blog is about poems
No it's not. It's about poems and prose.
ben: but our blog isnt all bout poems issit?
Of course it's not. But neither is Kwek's.
ben: maybe next time you will have ABS?
ben: i wonder whether you even get what are ABS...
You can go ask Kevin about this, I will not answer it myself.
Oh well, nice job clogging up our tagboard.
Ahh. Let's begin here.
ben: single; particular; separate: to number individual copies of a limited edition.
ben: that is one of the definition of indivdual in case you dont know
Of course, this may be true, but it just happens that ben kindly took out the definition that suited his purposes best. Let's see which one ben actually meant when he was writing his post.
Definition #1 from www.dictionary.com: a single human being, as distinguished from a group.
ben: it doesnt have to mean attacks on Kwek, how do you know i didnt mean attack on the poems?
Common excuse, the truth is, poems aren't commonly described as individuals.
ben: and the pot calling the kettle black stuff
ben: its totally attacking the person, go read your class notes, the one about practice what you preach
Alright. We are attacking each other, so that cancels out. Yay!
ben: after all you are out of so many contributors one of the ONLY one writing AK stuff
I'm not just the only one writing AK stuff, I'm the only one writing.
ben: you know kwek's blog is about poems
No it's not. It's about poems and prose.
ben: but our blog isnt all bout poems issit?
Of course it's not. But neither is Kwek's.
ben: maybe next time you will have ABS?
ben: i wonder whether you even get what are ABS...
You can go ask Kevin about this, I will not answer it myself.
Oh well, nice job clogging up our tagboard.
A Reply
Oh noes! U hurt my feelings.
Well... Let's dissect this bit by bit, shall we?
"i dont know how much time you guys really got, doing all these lame and childish stuff."
We have lots of time, thank you. Well, actually, after some irritating homework rushing, all we have to do is just post some AK stuff and we will feel better. Lameness and childishness is ... oh well, it lies in the eye of the beholder.
"go do something more productive instead of staring at the computer and typing these crap."
Hmm.. So funny, many people don't think it is crap. As I have said before, we have lots of time.
"if you think Kwek's poems suck, then don't read it"
Errr. I think I will save this first.
"grow up lurh"
Hmm... Is this the pot calling the kettle black?
"if you are doing this for fun then its fine."
Yes, we are doing this mostly for fun.
"but if you really mean it then i guess your lameness is indescribable."
I mean it to a small extent.
"i believe a lot of others out there also feel the same way i do."
And yet, I have 8 votes, not counting myself, and Kwek has 2, not counting my vote for him too.
"we read the class blog and we find these stupid posts."
Hmm.. If you think that this is childish and lame, then don't read it. Sounds familiar? I'll give you a hint: "if you think Kwek's poems suck, then don't read it"
this is NOT a flaming blog. not for some individual attacks here and there.
Aha! Note that we are not attacking Kwek. We are attacking his poetry.
"dont embarrass our class for nuts."
Few, if any, outside our class know about or read this blog, so it doesn't really matter. Besides, our class is sad enough with Kwek in it. Alright. If not Kwek, maybe Zhi You.
"its time you learn to make friends, not enemies."
Of course. By doing this, we are forging unity between ourselves. We are sharing the joys of laughing at Kwek's poetry.
I would continue, but I've reached the end of the post. What a pity.
Well... Let's dissect this bit by bit, shall we?
"i dont know how much time you guys really got, doing all these lame and childish stuff."
We have lots of time, thank you. Well, actually, after some irritating homework rushing, all we have to do is just post some AK stuff and we will feel better. Lameness and childishness is ... oh well, it lies in the eye of the beholder.
"go do something more productive instead of staring at the computer and typing these crap."
Hmm.. So funny, many people don't think it is crap. As I have said before, we have lots of time.
"if you think Kwek's poems suck, then don't read it"
Errr. I think I will save this first.
"grow up lurh"
Hmm... Is this the pot calling the kettle black?
"if you are doing this for fun then its fine."
Yes, we are doing this mostly for fun.
"but if you really mean it then i guess your lameness is indescribable."
I mean it to a small extent.
"i believe a lot of others out there also feel the same way i do."
And yet, I have 8 votes, not counting myself, and Kwek has 2, not counting my vote for him too.
"we read the class blog and we find these stupid posts."
Hmm.. If you think that this is childish and lame, then don't read it. Sounds familiar? I'll give you a hint: "if you think Kwek's poems suck, then don't read it"
this is NOT a flaming blog. not for some individual attacks here and there.
Aha! Note that we are not attacking Kwek. We are attacking his poetry.
"dont embarrass our class for nuts."
Few, if any, outside our class know about or read this blog, so it doesn't really matter. Besides, our class is sad enough with Kwek in it. Alright. If not Kwek, maybe Zhi You.
"its time you learn to make friends, not enemies."
Of course. By doing this, we are forging unity between ourselves. We are sharing the joys of laughing at Kwek's poetry.
I would continue, but I've reached the end of the post. What a pity.
guys, aka aks, just stop it, cos its damn lame.
i dont know how much time you guys really got, doing all these lame and childish stuff. go do something more productive instead of staring at the computer and typing these crap. if you think Kwek's poems suck, then don't read it, since you OBVIOUSLY know his blog is almost all poems or prose. grow up lurh. if you are doing this for fun then its fine. but if you really mean it then i guess your lameness is indescribable. i believe a lot of others out there also feel the same way i do.
we read the class blog and we find these stupid posts. this is NOT a flaming blog. not for some individual attacks here and there.
dont embarrass our class for nuts.
its time you learn to make friends, not enemies.
(OMG IMAGINE THAT COMING FROM ME!)
GOU LE!
i dont know how much time you guys really got, doing all these lame and childish stuff. go do something more productive instead of staring at the computer and typing these crap. if you think Kwek's poems suck, then don't read it, since you OBVIOUSLY know his blog is almost all poems or prose. grow up lurh. if you are doing this for fun then its fine. but if you really mean it then i guess your lameness is indescribable. i believe a lot of others out there also feel the same way i do.
we read the class blog and we find these stupid posts. this is NOT a flaming blog. not for some individual attacks here and there.
dont embarrass our class for nuts.
its time you learn to make friends, not enemies.
(OMG IMAGINE THAT COMING FROM ME!)
GOU LE!
Friday, 6 June 2008
Enlightenment
I get it. Now I know what a mushroom pool is. Gosh. Kwek's general knowledge is definitely something that we should all respect. We all should just stare in awe at his exuberant brilliance.Forgive my impertinence, oh almighty Kwek! I was ignorant to doubt your vast knowledge and experience! I beg you again, forgive my foolishness!
In case you want to learn more about mushroom pools, just visit this website:
http://www.inflateus.com/baby_pool_mushroom.htm
Kwek's New Poem
SCANSION
As I re-read these oft-read lines,
Within the light of dark confines,
A metaphor here, a simile there,
And hyperbole fair beyond compare.
"Within the light of dark confines"? Oh, give me a break.
And, internal rhyme is not for the last line of a stanza. Changing the fair to far will make it sound much better.
There leaps to mind the mise-en-scene,
Of castles tall, of mice and men,
A bugle calls – then peace, be still!
And dewdrops from the leaves distill.
Give me a break from french. You are using their screwed-up pronunciation to make your rhymes. How distasteful. Dewdrops distill? Do you mean that the dew is boiled and then condensed?
The wind – it washes in the willows,
And ripples – they minuet in the shallows,
Huff and a puff, they tell the tales,
Of wars and worlds – and trees and dales.
The first line is so unoriginal. And I don't think minuet is a very good word to describe ripples. They don't make music, do they? Nor do they dance.
Now it is a dark and stormy night,
The seven little dwarves by this affright,
They call to home, to mushroom pools,
To poisoned apples, to white toadstools.
Dark and stormy night. So clichéd. What are mushroom pools?
It puzzles me now, does it puzzle you not –
How sea and sky are of paper begot?
How by a trick of rhyme and time
A picture shines, a church-bell chimes.
I see. You leave much to be discussed so that you can say almost anything you want, which makes rhyme easier. How cheap.
It puzzles me yet but fear not thou –
These words are to men a blessing now –
Though spilled by sages on pen and page –
They charm us now, e’en till this age.
E'en. Thou. Disgusting pretentious Shakespeare wannabe.
Alright. For those who are ignorant, which includes Kwek, I shall explain what scansion is. Scansion of poetry is NOT the analysis of the content of the poem. It is... the analysis of the structure of the meter of the poem. Which renders your title, or your poem, woefully inappropriate.
Never mind. I shall take this opportunity to publish my two new pieces of AntiKwek poetry.
Now for the second one:
As I re-read these oft-read lines,
Within the light of dark confines,
A metaphor here, a simile there,
And hyperbole fair beyond compare.
"Within the light of dark confines"? Oh, give me a break.
And, internal rhyme is not for the last line of a stanza. Changing the fair to far will make it sound much better.
There leaps to mind the mise-en-scene,
Of castles tall, of mice and men,
A bugle calls – then peace, be still!
And dewdrops from the leaves distill.
Give me a break from french. You are using their screwed-up pronunciation to make your rhymes. How distasteful. Dewdrops distill? Do you mean that the dew is boiled and then condensed?
The wind – it washes in the willows,
And ripples – they minuet in the shallows,
Huff and a puff, they tell the tales,
Of wars and worlds – and trees and dales.
The first line is so unoriginal. And I don't think minuet is a very good word to describe ripples. They don't make music, do they? Nor do they dance.
Now it is a dark and stormy night,
The seven little dwarves by this affright,
They call to home, to mushroom pools,
To poisoned apples, to white toadstools.
Dark and stormy night. So clichéd. What are mushroom pools?
It puzzles me now, does it puzzle you not –
How sea and sky are of paper begot?
How by a trick of rhyme and time
A picture shines, a church-bell chimes.
I see. You leave much to be discussed so that you can say almost anything you want, which makes rhyme easier. How cheap.
It puzzles me yet but fear not thou –
These words are to men a blessing now –
Though spilled by sages on pen and page –
They charm us now, e’en till this age.
E'en. Thou. Disgusting pretentious Shakespeare wannabe.
Alright. For those who are ignorant, which includes Kwek, I shall explain what scansion is. Scansion of poetry is NOT the analysis of the content of the poem. It is... the analysis of the structure of the meter of the poem. Which renders your title, or your poem, woefully inappropriate.
Never mind. I shall take this opportunity to publish my two new pieces of AntiKwek poetry.
I looked at Kwek's blog – and nearly vomited today
And read his lots of poetry, to my great dismay
It lacked the right emotions, so unfeeling and so cold
To publish such poetry, he must be really bold
His rhyme was forced, and those horrors still
Haunt me to this day, his obvious lack of skill
I shuddered, and continued reading more
But soon after that, my eyes felt really sore
His obvious forced rhyme could be discerned
From William Mcgonagall, he must have learned
The poems lacked the rhythm, all meter-less
And I tried to endure the horrible verse
I fought my way to the bottom of the page
And what I saw filled me with rage
Who does he think he is? This big-headed guy
With poetry like this, he shouldn't try
He defiles this brilliant, age-old art
So many times, that's just a start
My eyes are hurting so badly by this time
He dares to say that he goes out with poetry and rhyme
Is that even poetry? It looks so much like prose
Sad to see such terrible verse, tragic thoughts arose
Shakespeare had set examples, but his work is down the drain
On his blog, Kwek is unaware of the poetry he's slain
And yet I have to go there, to warn you, and take heed
You better not go read it, or else your eyes will bleed
Now for the second one:
As darkness lit the empty room
He used his computer within the gloom
Writing poetry, typing prose
Without fear of dark or ghost
He poured out his inner feelings
Anger, fear, and other ailings
All into his long compositions
His fury, and his aggressions
But although his essays were so great
His verse had a far differing fate
His poems sucked every time
And they hardly even rhymed
And when they did, it sounded odd
It rhymed without reason, oh my god!
He rhymed for the sake of rhyming itself
Not utilising his mental wealth
He thought his poems were so outstanding
His pride could not take much bending
He continued with the false belief
His readers, poor things, had no relief
But no! He has not had his fill
Today, he writes his poems still
Who is this guy that I attack?
He is known as Theophilus Kwek
Thursday, 5 June 2008
Merchant Of Venice
Mrs. Suhaimi has a new message for all of you. She says that it would be good if everyone gets started reading Merchant of Venice. She will be going through the book in detail when school reopens. Happy holidays!
Wednesday, 4 June 2008
Fate's Perspective
OOPS! Go read Wee's poem at the penfest blog before reading this. It would be better.
Sorry Kevin, I couldn't resist.
Sorry Kevin, I couldn't resist.
Fate stood by its omniscient post
Down to earth, it did fly
It stole her from he who loved her most
As he watched her quickly die
Her blood melded with his tears
But Fate, as always, felt nothing
And while his blood hotly sears
Fate's was cold and forbidding
Fate invisibly watched and stared
As he cried and cried again
Fate was cruel, it didn't care
About his tears or pain
Fate decided to stop its peek
It felt no sadness, nor sadistic joy
Fate left, and flew away to seek
For another life to toy
Tuesday, 3 June 2008
URGENT CORRECTION FROM ME
Because of the stupidity of one of our posters, you have been misled into thinking that the penfest blog is the URL below.
However, the URL of the penfest blog is...
http://penfest.blogspot.com
Hope you have a great time reading (and criticising) Wee's poetry.
For tips on poetry criticism, here are two websites to help you.
http://www.anti-shurtugal.com/wordpress/?cat=8
And....
http://www.nylon.net/poetry/
Good luck.
However, the URL of the penfest blog is...
http://penfest.blogspot.com
Hope you have a great time reading (and criticising) Wee's poetry.
For tips on poetry criticism, here are two websites to help you.
http://www.anti-shurtugal.com/wordpress/?cat=8
And....
http://www.nylon.net/poetry/
Good luck.
Monday, 2 June 2008
URGENT NEWS FROM MRS. SUHAIMY
Hi guys,
Mrs. Suhaimy has news for you! (if you still have not known)
ERP2 list is the same as ERP1's.
Anyway, this is the link to the Penfesters blog (from Kevin)
: http://penfesters.blogspot.com (like the name already tells you)
Blubber.
Mrs. Suhaimy has news for you! (if you still have not known)
ERP2 list is the same as ERP1's.
Anyway, this is the link to the Penfesters blog (from Kevin)
: http://penfesters.blogspot.com (like the name already tells you)
Blubber.
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